I just want to lie here and cry and get it all out but I dont even know what's wrong anymore. I dont know how to cry and  fucking hate myself for everything and these fucking mood swings are a living fucking hell I hate it I hate it I hate it
Im so fucking upset and sad and I need someone to just hold me and tell me it's okay, Im never going to say it but I just want to be okay. I say I dont care but I CARE I FUCKING CARE MY LIFE IS DRAINING AND I CARE
holy shit
I hate myself for what I do
I cant talk
I cant breathe
Im always there
Im never there
I do everything wrong
I need help someone
I'll be okay but I dont know for how long
I need to talk to someone
I cant
I feel so down
I feel so hopeless
I am a mess