Sunday, September 12, 2010

Dodge

If I keep Dodge, I can say goodbye to my boyfriend, my body, my family, and my life. If I lose Dodge, I can say goodbye to my morals and ethnicity, my personal beliefs and ideas, what I stand for. Do I choose to abort, to kill, just because it's the easy way out? There's something big about having someone growing inside you. That one life is entirely in your hands. It grounds you. It makes you realise just how powerfull you can be. But is it even worth it, to create one more fatherless child? There's no way I would be able to support Dodge, so that would be another orphaned child whos mother gave them up. Maybe I want both options. I'm scared of what I might decide, I can't make this decision all on my own but I have to. It's so wrong, I shouldn't even have to think about this at my age!
Sometimes I think I feel his/her heart beating with mine. A soul within my soul... do I kill Dodge to keep my simplicity of life? Or do i try to do something for someone else other than myself? Even if it means giving up the life I've always had?

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Time Slowly Ticking...

It’s been a while since anyone actually read something I’ve written. Usually it’s too depressing and morbid. I don't know what I want to achieve with this, when I think about it. I guess I just want to leave my mark on the world, not to change it, but to know that I won’t be forgotten.
Is there anything worse than knowing your entire existence is based on the assumption that you will wake up tomorrow? Because nobody can say for certain that they actually will. And I want to leave something to be remembered by, because this is your life...and its ending, one minute at a time.